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I don't think twice about picking up my dog's poop, but if another dog's poop is next to it, I think, 'Eww, dog poop!


Jonah Goldberg

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If aliens saw us walking our dogs and picking up their poop, who would they think is in charge?
GROUCHO MARX
Dogs are angels full of poop.
OLIVER GASPIRTZ
I used to pick him up at school in the Poop Moose van. He was always so proud. He's crazy about the ...
DARRYL FENTON
I poop. You poop. We all poop. So why on TV is it only politically correct for cartoon bears to talk...
DARRELL CHESTER
I'm not racist I just think differently.
POOP POOP
If you were up to your neck in cat vomit and someone threw dog poop at you would you duck?
JOEL SAMAHA
I want to be remembered for my poop jokes. Those are the most important kind.
ERIC ANDRE
Why are you making cupcakes when you're just gonna poop them out?
PETE WENTZ
Some people are so positive, that when they slip in dog poop, they pirouette
JOSH STERN
You are all made of real poop.
ANNE FRANK
Does koala bear poop smell like cough drops?
TOM ROBBINS
Don't drink so much you poop where you eat.
A. KING
Dogs are the leaders of the planet. If you see two life forms, one of them's making a poop, the othe...
JERRY SEINFELD
I think it's really interesting to talk about Foucault in one chapter and smelling poop in the basem...
EDMUND WHITE
Nancy Pelosi brings disgrace to the word "nincum poop"
BLAIR R. LONG
You basically have eaten poop from either another person or animal somewhere.
KIRK SMITH
Girls don't poop, so don't claim you do. You can fart - because farting is funny - but we do...
RYAN HANSEN
We were all in a tight group on the poop looking at her.
JOSEPH CONRAD
I think you should only take your dog if it can get along with other dogs.
BETH PATTERSON
I do not care about the greatest good for the greatest number . . . Most people are poop-heads I do ...
JAMES ALAN GARDNER
I was so appalled. They were kind of waiting for Terry to walk out and perhaps take a poop or someth...
SHIRLEY MACLAINE
Glorious, stirring sight! The poetry of motion! The real way to travel! The only way to travel! Here...
KENNETH GRAHAME
We need to pull over now," she screeched as she gagged. "Paper is not supposed to be made out of poo...
ROBYN PETERMAN
She told her to get ready to start mucking the poop. They said they're going to get [the farm] back ...
LEAH SKIDMORE
Often, they expose it, then poop on it just to let you know they found it and they're not going to g...
STAN GEHRT
If you're really a mean person you're going to come back as a fly and eat poop.
KURT COBAIN
Glorious, stirring sight! The poetry of motion! The real way to travel! The only way to travel! Here...
KENNETH GRAHAM
As far as we can understand when it comes to the blueberry, it comes to a harvesting of poop,
PAUL GALLO
As far as we can understand when it comes to the blueberry, ... it comes to a harvesting of poop.
PAUL GALLO
I tell a lot of fart and poop jokes. I can't help it. I have no filter, and it just comes out.
TYLER POSEY
the only true way to prove that you have lost your inner child is if you don't laugh when you hear t...
AMANDA
Everyone knows dogs. Most people love dogs. I think most American families probably have a dog, but ...
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Every word serves a purpose. It conveys an idea. And the idea behind words like feces, stool, or poo...
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I like dogs
Big dogs
Little dogs
Fat dogs
Doggy dogs
Old dogs
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Most people don't know what a deficient diet looks like, but you can tell from their poop. This is l...
DAREK FARMER
I totally miss all that stuff. Touring in a van, playing small shows — those end up being the cool...
PETE WENTZ
A infinite number of monkeys on an infinite number of typewriters will eventually produce the works ...
COLLIN LYSFORD
The kids were talking about how important their dogs were to them. My daughter said, 'Hey, Dad, that...
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Last year was a little more inconclusive. This year, it says that goose poop does not effect (the wa...
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Grandchildren now don't write a thank you for the Christmas presents. They are walking on their pant...
ALAN SIMPSON
The little dogs are allowed on the big-dog side, but the big dogs aren't allowed on the little-dog s...
HOLLY SWOAPE
Some countries have more water than others - some can afford to use clean water to flush their poop ...
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So for some reason everybody makes this huge deal about pandas. I don't know why. They never actuall...
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I don't appreciate people who celebrate their dog's birthdays with "dog parties," and then invite th...
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HEATHER MILLER
Passing gas and 'poop talk' is normal in our daily lives. It might seem gross to some, but what come...
JACQUE LUKASZEWICZ
Saer is a great big poop, and you shouldn't listen to anything he says," I said, panting just a litt...
KATIE MACALISTER
I used to look at (my dog) Smokey and think, 'If you were a little smarter you could tell me what yo...
FRED JUNGCLAUS
I often think about dogs when I think about work and retirement. There are many breeds of dog that j...
MARTHA SHERRILL
No dog is too much for me to handle. I rehabilitate dogs, I train people. I am the dog whisperer.
CESAR MILLAN
I see more people picking up bottles and cans off the street. People think twice about throwing them...
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Bug? You sack of sweat stink. I've got farts that smell sweeter than you. Think you're better than m...
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My childhood was spent with dogs, and I work with dogs surrounding me. This relationship is hardly u...
DAVID WROBLEWSKI
Which is amazing if you think about it. We don't even allow them to bring their cats and dogs.
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Owning a program script is like owning a new born baby, all it does is eat sleep and poop. But ownin...
GANNON N/A
Some people think a dog is a dog, and some people think this dog is a part of my family. Some people...
JACKIE JORDAN
If dogs could start talking to man, I don’t think God would send them on earth.
VIKRANT PARSAI
ADA issues are ones that a lot of counties don't think about when drafting dog-specific ordinances. ...
DAWN CAPP
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But with dogs, we do have "bad dog." Bad dog exists. "Bad dog! Bad dog! Stole a biscuit, bad dog!" T...
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I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult.
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I'm never without my dog. They would be in every corner of the house, and my wife will not allow...
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I don't think that the world would be a better place if everyone owned a dog, and I don't th...
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Mines!” Patsy shouts, pointing at Tim. He goes to her, rumples her scanty hair.
“See, hot A...
HUNTLEY FITZPATRICK
I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult.
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Dog parks are a great way to give dogs a little exercise and meet other people. But it's important t...
JACK RUSSELL
If a dog fights with other dogs, if a dog does anything aggressive, he has to stay in the kennel.
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I get in my golf cart with my dogs, I have five dogs.
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The dog looked up in entreaty. Liquid brown eyes begged: Take me with you. I’ll be good. Oh, the l...
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The reason why women think men should spend a lot of money on an engagement ring is because women ar...
HEATHER CHAPPLE
I guess it was mainly my love of dogs. I had a dog at the time I started and I wanted to spend more ...
JACKIE JORDAN
I can't say I hate cats, but holy cow, dogs are a horse of another color.
PAM BROWN
I can't say I hate cats, but holy cow, dogs are a horse of another color.
CHUCK GRIFFIN
Some dogs take longer to mature. They're kind of freaked out by their first experience. You need to ...
CARLA KELLY
I can't say I hate cats, but holy cow, dogs are a horse of another color.
AMERICAN PROVERB
I can't say I hate cats, but holy cow, dogs are a horse of another color.
ROBERT BRAULT
I can't say I hate cats, but holy cow, dogs are a horse of another color.
ROGER CARAS
I can't say I hate cats, but holy cow, dogs are a horse of another color.
ANUJ SOMANY
I can't say I hate cats, but holy cow, dogs are a horse of another color.
NATHAN ELMO MELO
I can't say I hate cats, but holy cow, dogs are a horse of another color.
MARY BLY
I can't say I hate cats, but holy cow, dogs are a horse of another color.
TURKISH PROVERB
I can't say I hate cats, but holy cow, dogs are a horse of another color.
BIBLE
I can't say I hate cats, but holy cow, dogs are a horse of another color.
MICHAEL CAINE
I can't say I hate cats, but holy cow, dogs are a horse of another color.
ADRIAN SMITH
I can't say I hate cats, but holy cow, dogs are a horse of another color.
PROVERB
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And since you know what a tree-climbing weenie I am, I think it's pretty clear that I'm willing to d...
WENDELIN VAN DRAANEN
When the Strident Voices of Dissent loudly rise up from the Wilderness of Mann, the High-Flying Feat...
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I am deeply concerned about the situation of those dogs that are taken home by owners who only think...
ZHOU MIN
If you think dogs can't count, try putting three dog biscuits in your pocket and then giving Fido on...
PHIL PASTORET
If you think dogs can't count, try putting three dog biscuits in your pocket and then give him only ...
PHIL PASTORET
I can't say I hate cats, but holy cow, dogs are a horse of another color.
MICHAEL CAINE
I can't say I hate cats, but holy cow, dogs are a horse of another color.
ELLE MACPHERSON
I can't say I hate cats, but holy cow, dogs are a horse of another color.
DAVE SHAW
I can't say I hate cats, but holy cow, dogs are a horse of another color.
DEDRICK D. L. PITTER
I can't say I hate cats, but holy cow, dogs are a horse of another color.
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If I'm the MVP of the NFL, and I lose a game and go to a press conference and walk out of it, th...
BILL GOLDBERG
I don't know why he isn't dead, maybe he's lucky. Certainly his physical self is dead. Before the st...
JIM GOLDBERG
In general, you don't want competitors to understand your business outside of telling people you...
DAVE GOLDBERG
After you ride a roller coaster that's been going up for a year and a half, and you reach the pi...
BILL GOLDBERG
The muscles in my lower abdomen had torn off my pelvis.
BILL GOLDBERG
I strive to be my best every time I go out, and that's very stressful. After a while of doing th...
BILL GOLDBERG
Lasers are very much like computers. They don't like to get bounced around. And a rental laser is in...
DAVID GOLDBERG
I'm a man who makes his own decisions and sticks with them; I think there's a lot of integri...
BILL GOLDBERG
With U.S. mobile game sales having flattened from mid-2005, the industry has begun to support innova...
ERIC GOLDBERG
I mean, I think everybody realizes that calling people racist is a waste of time; nobody buys it any...
BERNARD GOLDBERG
Don't pretend to be a journalist if you're not a journalist.
BERNARD GOLDBERG
Look, everybody in journalism has a reputation of sorts.
BERNARD GOLDBERG
There's a kind of journalistic narcissism that New York-based journalists are guilty of.
BERNARD GOLDBERG
The most meaningless term in the English language is 'I take full responsibility.' When a po...
BERNARD GOLDBERG
As a matter of fact, you know, Jesus probably would be, except for one or two issues, a liberal Demo...
BERNARD GOLDBERG
Outlets are turning away from phone polling, which can be problematic. For example, we did a poll fo...
DAVE GOLDBERG
I run the largest survey company in the world. It just so happens to be the second-largest company r...
DAVE GOLDBERG
My closest adviser is my wife. It's nice to have one of the smartest people in business as your ...
DAVE GOLDBERG
You want to hire great people and give them the opportunity to fail. You need to let them figure thi...
DAVE GOLDBERG
I made my kids into Viking fans, so they will carry their misery with them, too. A little disappoint...
DAVE GOLDBERG
The grocery store is the great equalizer where mankind comes to grips with the facts of life like to...
JOSEPH GOLDBERG
Students who haven't budgeted for this are going to be in for a surprise. And we don't want students...
JOE GOLDBERG
It is time for students to have a break.
JOE GOLDBERG
We play teams that are much tougher and you can get injuries and not win a state title because of th...
JEFF GOLDBERG
It's a measuring stick for what the top of the mountain looks like in the country. In a matter of a ...
JEFF GOLDBERG
I don't think it's out of the ordinary because revenue estimating is always difficult.
LENNY GOLDBERG
These vetoes basically say to these people that they can flout the law without repercussions, ... Or...
LENNY GOLDBERG
California has always been successful because its high levels of public investment have gone hand-in...
LENNY GOLDBERG
Dana and Chris always said they were elected to a club they never wanted to join.
MAGGIE GOLDBERG
The whole copyright issue is very touchy, especially on the Internet. In the real world, people don'...
MAX GOLDBERG
As time goes on, I think my patience for free speech has dwindled somewhat.
MAX GOLDBERG
Everyone knows that in Hollywood, when you're hot, you've got to run with it. Because eventu...
EVAN GOLDBERG
I don't fully understand my wife's emotions - and I'm supposed to write an excellent fem...
EVAN GOLDBERG
I don't read good reviews. I like to know what percentages are going on. When Sony sends out som...
EVAN GOLDBERG
I don't look like Halle Berry. But chances are she's going to end up looking like me.
WHOOPI GOLDBERG
Stress is basically a disconnection from the earth, a forgetting of the breath. Stress is an ignor...
NATALIE GOLDBERG
Normal is in the eye of the beholder.
WHOOPI GOLDBERG
I am the American Dream. I am the epitome of what the American Dream basically said. It said you cou...
WHOOPI GOLDBERG
We're born with success. It is only others who point out our failures, and what they attribute t...
WHOOPI GOLDBERG
My experience with video games is a far cry from 'WWE 2K17.' Did I ever aspire to be that ch...
BILL GOLDBERG
I have met guys who work the overnight shift at 7-11, selling Slurpees and Camels to insomniacs who ...
BERNARD GOLDBERG
This is your life. You are responsible for it. You will not live forever. Don't wait.
NATALIE GOLDBERG
We're here for a reason. I believe a bit of the reason is to throw little torches out to lead people...
WHOOPI GOLDBERG
Grammar school never taught me anything about grammar.
ISAAC GOLDBERG
Our job as writers is to listen, to come home to the four corners of the earth.
NATALIE GOLDBERG
There's no such thing as a writer's block. If you're having trouble writing, well, pick ...
NATALIE GOLDBERG
Never underestimate people. They do desire the cut of truth.
NATALIE GOLDBERG
The act of song writing and recording became one and the same to me; because I essentially recorded ...
ADAM GOLDBERG
I'm not sure if being known opened or closed doors for me.
ADAM GOLDBERG
[Better terms. Contracts with steep termination fees are another barrier to dumping a carrier. Carri...
ADAM GOLDBERG
There probably is ... zero risk of any of these pesticides in the food supply,
ADAM GOLDBERG