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It’s not that I’m not social. I’m social enough. But the tools you guys create actually manufacture unnaturally extreme social needs. No one needs the level of contact you’re purveying. It improves nothing. It’s not nourishing. It’s like snack food. You know how they engineer this food? They scientifically determine precisely how much salt and fat they need to include to keep you eating. You’re not hungry, you don’t need the food, it does nothing for you, but you keep eating these empty calories. This is what you’re pushing. Same thing. Endless empty calories, but the digital-social equivalent. And you calibrate it so it’s equally addictive.
Dave Eggers
Related The French say you get hungry when you’re eating, and I get inspired when I’m working. It’s my... KARL LAGERFELD It’s not whether you’re right or wrong that’s important, but how much money you make when you... GEORGE SOROS Every weight loss program, no matter how positively it’s packaged, whispers to you that you’re n... KIM BRITTINGHAM Charlie, don’t you get it? I can’t feel that. It’s sweet and everything, but it’s like you... STEPHEN CHBOSKY It’s not if you
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and Care. OTHEN DONALD DALE CUMMINGS I mean, reality sucks. The world is a cancer, and shits so bad it’s scary. Everything’s filthy. ... MITCH LUCKER If you think you know what your purpose is, but can never seem to gain satisfaction from it, then it... A.J. DARKHOLME courage is what you do when you are scared. If you’re not scared, it’s not courage RAYAN BLACK Love versus love. King, you’re comparing infinities. There is no ‘more.’ That’s not how love... TIFFANY REISZ It’s odd to suddenly discover you’re happy right in the middle of a moment. Usually, you don’t... WODKE HAWKINSON Sometimes I just want to go in a room and break things and scream. Like, it’s so much pressure all... LIBBA BRAY It’s not what you do, but how much love you put into it that matters. RICK WARREN I didn’t know. I feel sometimes like…there are all these rules. Just to be a person. You know? Y... LEILA SALES It’s not our job to make people like us if they don’t want to. It’s not our job to change peop... TAYLOR SWIFT When you take risks you learn that there will be times when you succeed and there will be times when... ELLEN DEGENERES Sorry doesn’t mean anything! Not when you’re still with him. It’s not just that you cheated—... RACHEL VINCENT Besides, I’m not looking to get saved. I’m only going with her because it’s what you do when y... TIM THARP If you’re feeling empty, it’s because you refuse to fill in your own space. SUSIE L HILL Pamela, I’m in love with you. Yeah, it’s that bad. You’re so beautiful to me. Shut up! Lemme t... LOUIS C.K. You deserve better. I can’t promise you I’ll stay around, not because I don’t want to. It’s ... JENNIFER NIVEN Ladies, if you’re single there is nothing wrong, sinful or wicked about desiring a husband, nothin... MATT CHANDLER It is not what you know that counts; it’s how you use what you know. VIKRANT PARSAI You see, the best thing about wrong decisions is that they don’t prevent you from making the right... SIOBHAN VIVIAN As though sensing her heightening alarm, Pinfeathers halted his advance. "I can’t help ... KELLY CREAGH It’s not technically gossip if you start your sentence with “I’m really concerned about ______... BRIAN P. CLEARY It’s war, you jackasses,” Keyes snapped. “I’m sorry it’s not terribly convenient or comfor... JOHN SCALZI First, you drink the beer, obviously, and you think about everything you’ve been through, includin... RACHEL SHARP You need to think about all that, Sam,” Dekka said. “You’re the leader, after all.” “... MICHAEL GRANT I hope I’ll be able to come home, someday. But there are things I need to do first. I just want yo... RANSOM RIGGS It’s not so much where I want you,Sophie, as it is how. Nothing tastes quite like a woman, and no ... PAMELA CLARE No one tells you it’s all about to change, to be taken away. There’s no proximity alert, no indi... BLAKE CROUCH If it’s convenient to love you, you’re lying to someone about who you are or what you need. AGNOSTIC ZETETIC It’s very simple. As you grow, you learn more. If you stayed at twenty-two, you’d always be as i... MITCH ALBOM It’s odd, isn’t it? People die every day and the world goes on like nothing happened. But when i... KRISTINA MCMORRIS It’s simple guy logic: If a woman is angry? It means she cares. If you’re in a relationship and ... EMMA CHASE You’re not just different, you’re exceptional. And I think it’s time that I make you feel that... KANDI STEINER It’s like when you’re excited about a girl and you see a couple holding hands, and you feel so h... STEPHEN CHBOSKY Whatever you do, don’t feel sorry for me. I know it’s the best you can do. Life hasn’t hit you... JACQUELYN NICOLE DAVIS A hundred years later and someone gazes upon you as if you were heaven itself, but you know in your ... LAURELL K. HAMILTON But I didn't know about the other story." "What other story?” "About how you and Adrian ... RICHELLE MEAD The value you get does not depend on what you have, but how much of it you bring to the market place... ISRAELMORE AYIVOR That’s when I realized that I really loved you.” She sat down on the floor with me. She sp... STEPHEN CHBOSKY His forehead dropped to touch mine. “I’m gonna piss you off ‘cause I can be a dick. That’s w... KRISTEN ASHLEY No, it’s because you’re fucking pathetic. You’re no better than a human and to top it off you... R.L. MATHEWSON No, it’s because you’re f**king pathetic. You’re no better than a human and to top it off you... R.L. MATHEWSON As a wife you don’t question. By doing as you’re told, you’re relieved of the responsibility o... ALEATHA ROMIG All I ask is one thing, and I’m asking this particularly of young people: please don’t be cynica... CONAN O'BRIEN You’re lying to yourself. You’re holding this up as a way to keep me locked out. But it’s too ... SAMANTHA YOUNG ubiquitous , adj . When it’s going well, the fact of it is everywhere. It... DAVID LEVITHAN It ain’t how hard you are when you’re standing over top of someone that really matters. It’s h... CEDRIC NYE When you don’t have many friends and you don’t have a social life you’re kind of left looking ... TIM BURTON I like when you look at me like you can’t figure me out. You’re considering getting to know me, ... KATE ANGELL I suppose it’s not a social norm, and not a manly thing to do — to feel, discuss feelings. So th... JESS C. SCOTT Now, it’s not that you’re not apologising; like everyone else I have long accepted that you’re... DANIEL HANNAN It’s funny how much easier it is to see others’ shortcomings and give advice when you’re not p... ISABEL LOPEZ Every time you wake up, you let fly the most marvelous string of curses. It’s never the same twice... TESSA DARE If you’re a church person and not a Jesus person, my heart hurts for you. It’s like being engage... MATT CHANDLER Everyone has the same amount of hours per day, it’s not that you don’t have enough time, it’s ... BRIDGET ENGLISH You sound like whoever you’re around every day, it’s the same with your business! JOHN DI LEMME If you don’t have a parent or an adult, a teacher or a mentor … really see you, really love you,... JANE FONDA It’s hard to leave toxic relationships because you become dependent on the action of how they trea... DOMINIC RICCITELLO But it is. It’s something you need, and that’s a long way from nothing. If you need it, Eddie, w... STEPHEN KING Love your neighbor, even the ones who do not show you the same courtesy. You can’t expect to recei... ALEXANDRA ELLE It’s probably my job to tell you life isn’t fair, but I figure you already know that. So instead... C.J. REDWINE Honestly, it’s so easy to get what you want from people if they think you’re a psycho. SOPHIE KINSELLA It’s hard to understand failure when you’re going through it, but in the grand scheme of things ... ELLEN DEGENERES I think it’s the books that you read when you’re young that live with you forever. J.K. ROWLING Because you know, I’m your best friend, but you’re just not that badass, man. RACHEL CAINE Beauty is nothing, beauty won’t stay. You don’t know how lucky you are to be ugly, because if pe... CHARLES BUKOWSKI It’s not what you are that holds you back, it’s what you think you are not. DENIS WAITLEY You aren’t falling apart. You’re well beyond that. You’re just rattling along now. Elven dolls... DARRELL DRAKE Not giving up doesn’t mean that you hate losing, it’s showing that you have the courage to show ... RYAN KIER Remember, everything is right until it’s wrong. You’ll know when it’s wrong.” - “You... ERNEST HEMINGWAY Being an introvert doesn’t mean you’re shy. It means you enjoy being alone. Not just enjoy it—... AMY SCHUMER When you say “It’s hard”, it actually means
“I’m not strong enough to fight for it”. Sto... GUNDO MULAUDZI You’re different, and I know that’s probably the most cliché response ever given, but it’s th... CAROLINE GEORGE When you’re as charming and physically attractive as myself, it’s easy enough to win over people... JOHN GREEN There’s a Japanese phrase that I like: koi no yokan. It doesn’t mean love at first sight. It’s... NICOLA YOON You know the days when you get the mean reds? Paul Varjak: The mean reds. You mean like the blu... TRUMAN CAPOTE It’s not over if you’re still here,” Chronicler said. “It’s not a tragedy if you’re stil... PATRICK ROTHFUSS Of course men can’t know you when you’re unclean,’ said Hilda. ‘It says so in the Bible. Tha... FAY WELDON He’d set down his drink and leaned in. “Fine. You want me to elaborate, I will. Here’s the dea... JULIE JAMES I guess what I’m saying is that this all feels very familiar. But it’s not mine to be familiar a... STEPHEN CHBOSKY Social media is like your own personal brand of junk food; some is just added calories. NANETTE L. AVERY If something on the inside is telling you that someone isn’t right for you, they’re NOT right fo... MANDY HALE For what it’s worth... it’s never too late, or in my case too early, to be whoever you want to b... F. SCOTT FITZGERALD Food can become such a point of anxiety - not because it's food, but just because you have anxie... VANESSA CARLTON For what it’s worth: it’s never too late to be whoever you want to be. I hope you live a life yo... ERIC ROTH It’s like when you are excited about a girl and you see a couple holding hands, and you feel so ha... STEPHEN CHBOSKY It’s not the resources you have but how resourceful you are. DAN WALDSCHMIDT Sometimes it’s like people are a million times more beautiful to you in your mind. It’s like you... JENNY HAN Every once in a while, I get the urge. You know what I’m talking about, don’t you? The urge for ... DEREK LANDY You never have the sort of friends you have when you’re fifteen ever again. Even if you keep them ... FREDRIK BACKMAN You’re paid a lot and you’re not happy, so the first thing you do is buy stuff that you don’t ... DOUGLAS ADAMS The Board of Directors and I are pleased to recognize Peter's outstanding contribution to the succes... HARRY YOU We are pleased to close the books on 2004 following the painstaking review of almost five years of f... HARRY YOU Long-time viewing of Internet violence tend to change a person's temperament, making the person pron... YOU QUANXI It’s not really outstanding when you’re standing out Outcry is the only outburst,if you can... MUNIA KHAN Because if I ever get nailed, I don’t want you running out to get the same medicine. Believe me, i... HENRY V. O'NEIL If you’re the girl that needs a boyfriend, and once she loses that boyfriend needs to replace it w... TAYLOR SWIFT
More Dave Eggers
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DAVE EGGERS The kids sit facing the white board and collectively tell a story, ... As they're coming up with the... DAVE EGGERS There’s less need to slowly acclimate these guys to the tank,” Bailey said. “They’ll be food... DAVE EGGERS Yes, a dark time passed over this land, but now there is something like light. DAVE EGGERS I really believe strongly that kids should be spared the runoff of their parents' lives and prob... DAVE EGGERS Still though, I think if you're not self-obsessed, you're probably boring. DAVE EGGERS All we really want is for no one to have a boring life, to be impressive, so we can be impressed. ~ ... DAVE EGGERS We thought we were young and that there would be time to love well sometime in the future. This is a... DAVE EGGERS This morning there s first a predictable story about Darfur; an expert on African affairs notes that... DAVE EGGERS It was always difficult to get cattle returned once a marriage was dissolved. DAVE EGGERS But we're no longer rain, I said, we're no longer seeds. We're men. Now we can stand and decide. Thi... DAVE EGGERS My plans are a jumble for now, but I do know certain things that I will and will not do. [...] I wil... DAVE EGGERS I had the sensation that I might always be running like this, that I would always have to run, and t... DAVE EGGERS This boy thinks I am not of his species, that I am some other kind of creature, one that can be crus... DAVE EGGERS I wondered quickly if I'd give my life so that a dragon could live. If someone offered me that deal,... DAVE EGGERS But the grind has begun. The windows don’t open, and even the availability of near-constant jokes ... DAVE EGGERS –Don’t you think the vast majority of the chaos in the world is caused by a relatively small gro... DAVE EGGERS I grew up north of Chicago, not far from where the Schwinn bicycle plant used to be, and was conscio... DAVE EGGERS Some of these kids just don't plain know how good they are: how smart and how much they have to ... DAVE EGGERS I mean, all this stuff you're involved in, it's all gossip. It's people talking about each other beh... DAVE EGGERS When I was on the bestseller list with the first book, everyone who knows me knows that every week i... DAVE EGGERS I will not wait to love as best as I can. We thought we were young and that there would be time to l... DAVE EGGERS And that's actually the brunt of what we do is, people going straight from their workplace, stra... DAVE EGGERS That is when the commitment to change would be put to the test: when the cameras are gone and the re... DAVE EGGERS THE BOUNTY In her kitchen, she saw many things she would like to eat. On the counter, there was... DAVE EGGERS You see pictures of Buddha and he’s sitting, reclining, at peace. The Hindus have their twelve-arm... DAVE EGGERS He was warm, partly because he had on many layers, and partly because boys whoa re part wolf and par... DAVE EGGERS I've purposely stayed away from reading much about postmodern theory, and most everything I have... DAVE EGGERS You have what I can afford to give. You are a panhandler, begging for anything, and I am the man wal... DAVE EGGERS I cannot count the times I have cursed our lack of urgency. If I ever love again, I will not wait to... DAVE EGGERS Every part of my body felt electric. My chest ached and my head throbbed with the great terrible lim... DAVE EGGERS In hospitals I feel palpable comfort. I feel the competence, the expertise, so much education and mo... DAVE EGGERS I am myself a failed cartoonist, There are a million reasons to ruin things. DAVE EGGERS You treat a kid with respect and as an adult you talk to them as if they're smart people. But yo... DAVE EGGERS There are many Saudi women doctors, and there are many wealthy and powerful and well-educated Saudi ... DAVE EGGERS Thank you," he says. "Thank who?" "I don't know. You?" "No, not me. Jesus ." DAVE EGGERS Three-dimensional results are important to me. I did once spend some time just writing, and floating... DAVE EGGERS Because I grew up with this naive expectation of people doing right, I get shocked by every little v... DAVE EGGERS Who's got the Paris Review? ... It's under a new editor. DAVE EGGERS [After this interview Eggers is off to a meeting in midtown Manhattan. Then come more appointments a... DAVE EGGERS I don't think there's a neighborhood where more writers live. There is no neighborhood in the world ... DAVE EGGERS Max had to think about these new developments. He hadn't liked getting hit by a rock--his stomach st... DAVE EGGERS It's not that our family has no taste, it's just that our family's taste is inconsistent... DAVE EGGERS I went to Saudi Arabia in 2010, and spent most of my time in Jeddah and the King Abdullah Economic C... DAVE EGGERS I was trying to make the web more civil. I was trying to make it more elegant. I got rid of anonymit... DAVE EGGERS So this is the space during tutoring hours. It's very busy. Same principles: one-on-one attentio... DAVE EGGERS It's our theory that everything trickles down from there, ... That if you have high salaries, good c... DAVE EGGERS I'd rather people just borrow the idea and do their own thing in their own community, ... Whenever p... DAVE EGGERS Our town was rigid in many ways, in terms of the uniformity of things, the colors of skin, the makes... DAVE EGGERS Status in itself is criminal for those with the means to move, and the means to weave communion betw... DAVE EGGERS They took my mother's stomach out six months ago. DAVE EGGERS It was just an idea I had, that it could be cool to have a book covered in fake fur. DAVE EGGERS But while mum and dad were incredibly caring, it was also a very chaotic household where everyone fo... DAVE EGGERS His lies were so exquisite I almost wept. DAVE EGGERS Here though, there are no oppressors. No one's forcing you to do this. You willingly tie yourself to... DAVE EGGERS Dear Producers, Something is radiating deep within me and it must be transmitted or I will imp... DAVE EGGERS My mind, I know, I can prove, hovers on hummingbird wings. It hovers and it churns. And when it's op... DAVE EGGERS it seemed, had some purpose, even if that purpose was just to ask for something. DAVE EGGERS The issue is complex, but like many matters in Sudan, it is not as complex as Khartoum would want th... DAVE EGGERS I have had friends who I decided were not good friends, were people who brought more trouble than ha... DAVE EGGERS Hello Frances, I have just been to health class, and I was wondering how your feminine parts were de... DAVE EGGERS Whatever I do, however I find a way to live, I will tell these stories. I have spoken to every perso... DAVE EGGERS But everyone disappears, no matter who loves them. DAVE EGGERS High school teachers who want to get reluctant readers turned around need to give the students some ... DAVE EGGERS I am myself a failed cartoonist, DAVE EGGERS The idea we came up with, well before we left, was something we coined Performance Literature. Excus... DAVE EGGERS But criticism, for the most part, comes from the opposite place that book-enjoying should come from.... DAVE EGGERS The country he had left thirty years ago had been a realistic place. There were political realities ... DAVE EGGERS People are strange, but more than that, they're good. They're good first, then strange. DAVE EGGERS I met a lot of great people in Saudi Arabia and I'd like to see them again. And I'd love to ... DAVE EGGERS SECRETS ARE LIES SHARING IS CARING PRIVACY IS THEFT DAVE EGGERS Books have a unique way of stopping time in a particular moment and saying: Let’s not forget this. DAVE EGGERS That’s what books do. They are the building blocks, the DNA, if you will, of you. Think of everyth... DAVE EGGERS We are not meant to know everything, Mae. Did you ever think that perhaps our minds are delicately c... DAVE EGGERS I think newspapers shouldn't try to compete directly with the Web, and should do what they can d... DAVE EGGERS There's nothing to be gained from passive observance, the simple documenting of conditions, because,... DAVE EGGERS Tim O'Brien's book about Vietnam, 'The Things They Carried', has won every award, is... DAVE EGGERS Status in itself is criminal for those with the means to move, and the means to weave communion betw... DAVE EGGERS Even higher critics have often admitted that the tenth chapter of Genesis is a remarkably accurate h... DAVE EGGERS We see the beauty within and cannot say no. DAVE EGGERS She needs a new journal. The one she has is problematic. To get to the present, she needs to page th... DAVE EGGERS The idea of 'Voice of Witness' is to let survivors and witnesses of human-rights abuses tell... DAVE EGGERS The house is a factory. DAVE EGGERS It all sounds good, and it seems to me, if a system would work, this might be the spot. But frankly,... DAVE EGGERS People are strange, but more than that, they're good. They're good first, then strange. DAVE EGGERS I try to get anybody coming to San Francisco to come to the Mission. Not to misuse the word 'authent... DAVE EGGERS What can I do for you, my man? DAVE EGGERS This democracy thing, or Demoxie, whatever it is, good god. Under the guise of having every voice he... DAVE EGGERS But you know, there's something about the kids finishing their homework in a given day, working ... DAVE EGGERS I can remember exactly where I sat when my teacher first read Roald Dahl's 'James and the Gi... DAVE EGGERS I'm interested in the human impact of the giant foot of misplaced government. After all, we enco... DAVE EGGERS McSweeney's as a publishing company is built on a business model that only works when we sell ph... DAVE EGGERS Having lost people when they were young, you feel intimately acquainted with mortality, I guess. Tho... DAVE EGGERS Humans are divided between those who can still look through the eyes of youth and those who cannot. DAVE EGGERS If a boy became sick he walked alone; the others were afraid to catch what he had, and did not want ... DAVE EGGERS I often cannot believe the things I do. DAVE EGGERS Nothing again. No one is listening. No one is waiting to hear the kicking of a man above. It is unex... DAVE EGGERS I had forgotten that, and so many things. How could I put everything down on paper? It seemed imposs... DAVE EGGERS If I ever fall in love again, I will not wait to love as best as I can. We thought we were young and... DAVE EGGERS Why do you want to be on The Real World? -Because I want everyone to witness my youth DAVE EGGERS We feel that to reveal embarrassing or private things, we have given someone something, that, like a... DAVE EGGERS So many of the things I invented I honestly did for fun, out of some perverse game of whether or not... DAVE EGGERS I've never had WiFi at home. I'm too easily distracted, and YouTube is too tempting. DAVE EGGERS Existing, period – that is what drives men to irrational acts. DAVE EGGERS You will die, and when you die, you will know a profound lack of it [dignity]. It's never dignified,... DAVE EGGERS One might think that a boy who was out in the snow for so long would get cold, but Max was not. He w... DAVE EGGERS I think almost every writer in the world would hope that books would be always talked about with res... DAVE EGGERS Every time I get through the work on a book of nonfiction, I say I'll never do it again; it take... DAVE EGGERS When we moved out of Manhattan - where nobody speaks to anyone else even though they all live close ... DAVID EGGERS If somebody here isn't tolerant and accepting, we haven't met them yet. DAVID EGGERS Not all chemicals are bad. Without chemicals such as hydrogen and oxygen, for example, there would b... DAVE BARRY A theme is a memory aid, it helps you through the presentation just as it also provides the thread o... DAVE CAREY Politicians are like diapers. They both need changing regularly and for the same reason. DAVE BARRY Electricity is actually made up of extremely tiny particles called electrons that you cannot see wit... DAVE BARRY We Americans live in a nation where the medical-care system is second to none in the world, unless y... DAVE BARRY I can win an argument on any topic, against any opponent. People know this, and steer clear of me at... DAVE BARRY If you live life, then you become what are. DAVE MATTHEWS Remove every barrier you can to fandom. A fan will be an evangelist for your work. DAVE KELLETT Without question, the greatest invention in the history of mankind is beer. Oh, I grant you that the... DAVE BARRY American consumers have no problem with carcinogens, but they will not purchase any product, includi... DAVE BARRY Because you have things like 'American Idol' and you've got radio stations that play mus... DAVE GROHL I taught myself how to play the guitar, I taught myself how to play the drums, and I kind of fake do... DAVE GROHL There's poetry in being the band that can sell out Wembley but also makes a record in a garage. ... DAVE GROHL I've experienced great things, I've experienced great tragedies. I've done almost everyt... DAVE GROHL There's always gonna be rock n' roll bands, there's always gonna be kids that love rock ... DAVE GROHL If there's one thing I'm good at, it's gathering people together to do something fun. DAVE GROHL At a family's most difficult time, I want to make sure at a minimum that they have the very basi... DAVE REICHERT Even when I lecture per se, I am a joke comedian, I can do the voices. DAVE PELZER I know I can be very standoffish. DAVE PELZER Whatever you do for the sole purpose of having others admire you, your efforts will most likely be i... DAVE PELZER I am a very shy, introverted guy. DAVE PELZER 'A Child Called It' was a story about resilience, it was never about boo hoo hoo, it was abo... DAVE PELZER Something good comes out of every crisis. DAVE PELZER I am interested in politics. DAVE MUSTAINE I've never believed in singing about Satan and thinking he's cool, because he's not. DAVE MUSTAINE The guitar influence that affected my songwriting came from the New Wave of British Heavy Metal. DAVE MUSTAINE I guess because I had such a horrible life growing up, going from place to place not knowing what I ... DAVE MUSTAINE When you've got somebody who's a flaming liberal like Bill Maher calling you out, something&... DAVE MUSTAINE What I couldn't say verbally I was able to express physically through the guitar. DAVE MUSTAINE In order to be a great marketer, you have to be focused and intense and look at scarcity, urgency, a... DAVE RAMSEY You don't need credit. DAVE RAMSEY You need some quick wins in order to stay pumped enough to get out of debt completely. DAVE RAMSEY Hitting bottom and hitting it hard was the worst thing that ever happened to me and the best thing t... DAVE RAMSEY You've got to tell your money what to do or it will leave. DAVE RAMSEY For me, going home at 5:30 is as much about my own choices, but also giving my team those choices, t... DAVE GOLDBERG It does not make sense that we are allowing known potential weapons, not unlike those the 9-11 hijac... DAVE REICHERT Scissors, screwdrivers and the like pose an unacceptable risk to flight crews as well passengers. DAVE REICHERT I have faith the men and women of the Coast Guard will immediately rise to the challenge and see the... DAVE REICHERT Congress has an obligation to protect our country's natural beauty, embodied in our nation's... DAVE REICHERT It is vitally important that we implement immigration reform. We need a bill that strengthens our bo... DAVE REICHERT To help yourself, you must be yourself. Be the best that you can be. When you make a mistake, learn ... DAVE PELZER A friend is always good to have, but a lover's kiss is better than angels raining down on me. DAVE MATTHEWS Instead of sailing off into the sunset, he hopes to sail into the next century. DAVE ANDERSON I never excelled at one sport or had a very strong passion for anything other than wrestling and bod... DAVE BAUTISTA What may seem depressing or even tragic to one person may seem like an absolute scream to another pe... DAVE BARRY If you had to identify, in one word, the reason why the human race has not achieved, and never will ... DAVE BARRY Although golf was originally restricted to wealthy, overweight Protestants, today it's open to a... DAVE BARRY The Sixties are now considered a historical period, just like the Roman Empire. DAVE BARRY I never needed much, and I never thought I'd get more than what I had. A trip to Burger King was... DAVE GROHL Scientists now believe that the primary biological function of breasts is to make males stupid. DAVE BARRY If you have an infinate number of monkeys and an infinate number of Sparcs, they will eventually c... DAVE MORGAN If people have a basic understanding of right from wrong, possess a strong desire to better themselv... DAVE PELZER I learned from Arnold Schwarzenegger, too, that it's O.K. to be pluggish. DAVE PELZER I once received a cape that was made from the little purple bags that Crown Royal Whisky comes in. DAVE GROHL I just know that it's smart for my career to carve my own path and do my own thing. DAVE FRANCO Standing out as a writer today requires more than a bright idea and limpid prose. Authors need to be... DAVE MORRIS If you haven't signed anything, you cant be ripped off. DAVE SIM Everything that I've worked on at Lucasfilm has been considered canon. DAVE FILONI I love the place 'Clone Wars' has on Netflix; it's very accessible, and I think it's... DAVE FILONI Plans never go as planned, ever; that’s just how life is. People spend way too much time dreaming ... DAVE MATTHES Joy comes from places you least expect it. It's usually the simple things, like watching my son ... DAVE GAHAN That's country music for you - bourbon and the Bible. DAVE HAYWOOD The Left likes to think of itself as the bulwark of progressive liberal individualism, and yet it se... DAVE BRAT The important thing to remember is that bugs don't actually talk. DAVE FOLEY I had a few brushes with death, where I nearly chose to go. The final one in 1996 did it for me. I s... DAVE GAHAN