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Why do you sit there looking like an envelope without any address on it?


Mark Twain

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If you want to meet Mark Twain, all you have to do is use your brain!
STEVE RAY COLLINS
We should be careful to get out of an experience only the wisdom that is in it - and stop there; les...
MARK TWAIN
Mark Twain: A Life
RON POWERS
Mark Twain.
FRIENDS
If you hold a cat by the tail, you learn things you can't learn any other way.--Mark Twain
TONY-PAUL DE VISSAGE
Bob Hope, like Mark Twain, had a sense of humor that was uniquely American, and like Twain, we'll li...
DICK VAN DYKE
Mark Twain gave us an insight into the life on the Mississippi at the turn of the century.
BOB NEWHART
Mark Twain cannot be defined.
HAL HOLBROOK
Everyday people all over the world take advantage of life, they abuse it and dice with it.Life is so...
GARY F EVANS...
Bob Hope, like Mark Twain, had a sense of humor that was uniquely American, and like Twain, we'l...
DICK VAN DYKE
Everyday people all over the world take advantage of life, they abuse it and dice with it.Life is so...
GARY F EVANS...
Why should we save them? It's part of the historical legacy of California. They were made famous by ...
MARC HAYES
When you find that you are on the side of the majority, it's time to pause and reflect." Mark Twain
STEVE J. LEATHERWOOD
Human beings can be awful cruel to one another.
MARK TWAIN
The highest perfection of politeness is only a beautiful edifice, built, from the base to the dome, ...
MARK TWAIN
There has been much tragedy in my life; at least half of it actually happend. -Mark Twain.
MARK TWAIN
I, Mark Twain being of sound mind, have spent everything
MARK TWAIN
Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn't do than by the ones you...
MARK TWAIN
Mark Twain is as big as America. He really is.
VAL KILMER
Students don't know who Mark Twain was because he wasn't on the test.
KINKY FRIEDMAN
Conservatism is the blind and fear-filled worship of dead radicals.
MARK TWAIN
I read from Mark Twain's lips one or two of his good stories. He has his own way of thinking, saying...
HELEN KELLER
His head was an hour-glass; it could stow an idea, but it had to do it a grain at a time, not the wh...
MARK TWAIN
To a hacker, you're just an IP address. You get hit because you let yourself be an easy mark.
IRA WINKLER
The first half of life consists of the capacity to enjoy without the chance; the last half consists ...
MARK TWAIN
I grew up reading Shakespeare and Mark Twain.
JACKSON BROWNE
To paraphrase Mark Twain, our demise is greatly exaggerated.
CHRIS DONLAY
Students don't know who Mark Twain was because he wasn't on the test.
KINKY FRIEDMAN
Mark Twain put it best when he said, 'Reports of my demise are greatly exaggerated,
BILL BRADLEY
Aging is a matter of mind. If you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter.
ANONYMOUS
A lie can travel half way around the world while the truth is putting on its shoes.
MARK TWAIN
Minds are like flowers. If you let it sit there without soaking anything up, it will dry up.
KEN HILL
It doesn't do any good to sit up and take notice if you keep on sitting.
It doesn't do any good to sit up and take notice if you keep on sitting.
SOURCE UNKNOWN
The only way to keep your health is to eat what you don't want, drink what you don't like, and do wh...
MARK TWAIN
I agree with what Mark Twain said - we're all mad at night.
RUTH RENDELL
At my age I do what Mark Twain did. I get my daily paper, look at the obituaries page and if I'm not...
PATRICK MOORE
The reason there's a question mark on my front door is just in case I forget my address.
LESLIE NIELSEN
All modern American literature comes from one book by Mark Twain called Huckleberry Finn.
ERNEST HEMINGWAY
Consider well the proportion of things. It is better to be a young June bug, than an old bird of par...
MARK TWAIN
A conspiracy is nothing but a secret agreement of a number of men for the pursuance of policies whic...
OSSIP GABRILOWITSCH
Honesty: The best of all the lost arts.
MARK TWAIN
The math on the savings is pretty clear. You could do it on the back of an envelope. What you have h...
ALENKA GREALISH
If you don't read the newspaper, you're uninformed. If you read the newspaper, you're mis-informed.
MARK TWAIN
I wish it wasn't like this. I sit and watch stuff on the television, I think, 'Why, why, why.
PHIL COLLINS
There is nothing training cannot do. Nothing is above its reach. It can turn bad morals to good; it ...
MARK TWAIN
Confound it, it's foolish, Tom
MARK TWAIN
I'm looking forward to it, ... You sit there and tell your side of it.
LANCE ARMSTRONG
All modern American literature comes from one book by Mark Twain called "Huckleberry Finn."
ERNEST HEMINGWAY
Of all the things I've lost, I miss my mind the most [borrowed from Mark Twain]
GERARD WAY
There is nothing training cannot do. Nothing is above its reach. It can turn bad morals to good; it ...
MARK TWAIN
Never have a battle of wits with an unarmed person.
MARK TWAIN
You can find in a text whatever you bring, if you will stand between it and the mirror of you imagin...
MARK TWAIN
He (Holbrook) said he has one of the first Mark Twain costumes he wore on stage and was saving it un...
LEE WARREN
Mark Twain had a way of telling stories that shifts your consciousness away from labels.
VAL KILMER
[March 25 -] Songs and Stories for Everybody ... the Mark Twain of contemporary kids' music.
BILL HARLEY
I do find it amusing when somebody cuts me off, makes an aggressive move on me in a car. I'm lik...
JIMMIE JOHNSON
I always like to break out and address the audience. In 'The History Boys', for instance, wi...
ALAN BENNETT
Or maybe there never were any rules. Maybe all we have are habits. Things we do without even knowing...
PAOLO BACIGALUPI
Do the thing and you will have the power.
RALPH WALDO EMERSON
If you can do it, why you won't do it???
If you have chance why you won't use it?
DEYTH BANGER
He begged hard, and said he couldn't play—a plausible excuse, but too thin; there wasn't a musicia...
MARK TWAIN
Mark Twain has been credited as saying, “The two most important days in your life are the day you ...
JOSHUA BECKER
Right from the start, I loved the works of Mark Twain. Every time I read about Tom Sawyer, I'd g...
JOHN GRISHAM
I appreciate the forwarding function. It lets me have all the benefits of an added e-mail address wi...
CATIE EISEL
I wish that I could live without you
DAZZLїиG_Бципу
It was enough just to sit there without words.
LOUISE ERDRICH
The Public is a thing I cannot help looking upon as an enemy, and which I cannot address without fee...
JOHN KEATS
put together on the back of an envelope.
JUDD GREGG
Do. Then talk. In that order.
SOTERO M LOPEZ II
Under certain circumstances, profanity provides a relief denied even to prayer."

[Mark...
MARK TWAIN
Writing songs and looking for ideas is like blinking my eyes. It's an involuntary muscle. I do i...
TOBY KEITH
The Public - a thing I cannot help looking upon as an enemy, and which I cannot address without feel...
JOHN KEATS
Just like any one of us, they started with no road map or guarantee of success. But they went out an...
CAMILLE SWEENEY
I just do whatever I do, and put it out there without tryin' to cater to anybody. If you like it...
ACTION BRONSON
Don't just sit there and drool. Act like an idiot.
ALLEN TAYLOR
I bought a book of Mark Twain quotes. That's about my speed. I'll read a couple quotes and p...
KID ROCK
The software walks you through it. If you put in an address in Harrison County, it will ask you if y...
KATHY WATERBURY
If it's what you do and you can do it, then you do it.
VAN MORRISON
If you think you can do it, you can.
JOHN BURROUGHS
If you can dream it, you can do it.
ENZO FERRARI
He let her do it, then looked around for his fingers. There they were, curled like a bloody quotatio...
PHILIP PULLMAN
I just want to keep pushing the envelope without it feeling forced.
THE WEEKND
You can't just sit around and do nothing while you're waiting - you have to kind of piggyback on som...
CAROLINE WHITACRE
It was harder racing the track today than it was the competition. The heat was a factor and it had a...
BOBBY ALLISON
An envelope is not just an envelope, it's a letter. We still will go to the mailbox … hoping today ...
DANIEL STEIN
It ain't bragging if you can do it.
DIZZY DEAN
The words. Why did they have to exist? Without them, there wouldn't be any of this.
MARKUS ZUSAK
Always rise from the table with an appetite, and you will never sit down without one.
WILLIAM PENN
Why didn't you kill me like you did that guy back there? Billy? Or does it even make any sense to as...
STEPHEN KING
This is the kind of platform we've been looking for a long time. Libraries digitize their stuff and ...
DANIEL GREENSTEIN
An artist is attracted to certain kinds of form without knowing why. You adopt a position intuitivel...
FERNANDO BOTERO
Mark Twain said, 'The right word is to the nearly right word as lightning is to the lightning bu...
ROBERT LITTELL
All I say is, nobody has any business to go around looking like a horse and behaving as if it were a...
DOROTHY PARKER
It is curious-curious that physical courage should be so common in the world, and moral courage so r...
MARK TWAIN
If it wasn't for the Mark Twain Masquers, I don't know where my life would have gone.
PETER FALK
Always rise from the table with an appetite, and you will never sit down without one.
HORACE GREELEY
All modern American literature comes from one book by Mark Twain called Huckleberry Finn. American w...
ERNEST HEMINGWAY
Why does any kind of cynicism appeal to people? Because it seems like a mark of maturity, of sophist...
ELIEZER YUDKOWSKY
Why do you like Hugh better? Because he is a Viscount?'
'Well, that's one reason,' I admitted, ...
L.P. HARTLEY

More Mark Twain

I can teach anybody how to get what they want out of life. The problem is that I can't find anybody ...
MARK TWAIN
[He was] a solemn, unsmiling, sanctimonious old iceberg who looked like he was waiting for a vacancy...
MARK TWAIN
In our country we have those three unspeakably precious things: freedom of speech, freedom of consci...
MARK TWAIN
I never could tell a lie that anybody would doubt, nor a truth that anybody would believe.
MARK TWAIN
If Christ were here now there is one thing he would not be - a Christian.
MARK TWAIN
In the first place, God made idiots. That was for practice. Then he made school boards
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It takes your enemy and your friend, working together, to hurt you: the one to slander you, and the ...
MARK TWAIN
I did not attend his funeral, but I wrote a nice letter saying I approved it.
MARK TWAIN
When I think of the number of disagreeable people that I know who have gone to a better world, I am ...
MARK TWAIN
Whenever the literary German dives into a sentence, that is the last you are going to see of him unt...
MARK TWAIN
Let us endeavor to live that when we come to die even the undertaker will be sorry.
MARK TWAIN
How empty is theory in the presence of fact
MARK TWAIN
Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear-not absence of fear. Except a creature be part cowar...
MARK TWAIN
Never pick a fight with people who buy ink by the barrel.
MARK TWAIN
Few things are harder to put up with than the annoyance of a good example.
MARK TWAIN
He is now rising from affluence to poverty.
MARK TWAIN
Many a small thing has been made large by the right kind of advertising.
MARK TWAIN
I can live for two months on a good compliment.
MARK TWAIN
All you need in this life is ignorance and confidence, and then success is sure.
MARK TWAIN
Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence on society.
MARK TWAIN
Patriotism is supporting your country all the time, and your government when it deserves it.
MARK TWAIN
Travel is fatal to prejudice, bigotry, and narrow-mindedness, and many of our people need it sorely ...
MARK TWAIN
I must have a prodigious amount of mind; it takes me as much as a week, sometimes, to make it up!
MARK TWAIN
History doesn't repeat itself, but it does rhyme.
MARK TWAIN
The more I learn about people, the more I like my dog.
MARK TWAIN
Most writers regard the truth as their most valuable possession, and therefore are economical in its...
MARK TWAIN
They did not know it was impossible so they did it
MARK TWAIN
The easy confidence with which I know another man's religion is folly teaches me to suspect that my ...
MARK TWAIN
Substitute 'damn' every time you're inclined to write 'very;' your editor will delete it and the wri...
MARK TWAIN
If you don't read the newspaper, you're uninformed. If you read the newspaper, you're mis-informed.
MARK TWAIN
The man who does not read has no advantage over the man who cannot read.
MARK TWAIN
Of all God's creatures, there is only one that cannot be made slave of the leash. That one is the ca...
MARK TWAIN
Never tell the truth to people who are not worthy of it.
MARK TWAIN
The dog is a gentleman; I hope to go to his heaven not man's.
MARK TWAIN
Under certain circumstances, profanity provides a relief denied even to prayer.
MARK TWAIN
Prosperity is the best protector of principle.
MARK TWAIN
There is no sadder sight than a young pessimist, except an old optimist.
MARK TWAIN
My parents were neither very poor nor conspicuously honest.
MARK TWAIN
France has neither winter nor summer nor morals. Apart from these drawbacks it is a fine country.
MARK TWAIN
When I was younger, I could remember anything, whether it had happened or not.
MARK TWAIN
There are only two forces that can carry light to all the corners of the globe... the sun in the hea...
MARK TWAIN
There is no such thing as the Queen's English. The property has gone into the hands of a joint stock...
MARK TWAIN
Humanity has unquestionably one really effective weapon
MARK TWAIN
Against the assault of laughter nothing can stand.
MARK TWAIN
It takes an enemy and a friend, working together, to hurt you to the heart. The one to slander you, ...
MARK TWAIN
In the real world, nothing happens at the right place at the right time. It is the job of journalist...
MARK TWAIN
Let us consider that we are all partially insane. It will explain us to each other; it will unriddle...
MARK TWAIN
A habit cannot be tossed out the window; it must be coaxed down the stairs a step at a time.
MARK TWAIN
To cease smoking is the easiest thing I ever did. I ought to know, I've done it a thousand times.
MARK TWAIN
Thousands of geniuses live and die undiscovered -- either by themselves or by others.
MARK TWAIN
Forgiveness is the fragrance that the violet sheds on the heel that has crushed it
MARK TWAIN
Adam was the luckiest man; he had no mother-in-law.
MARK TWAIN
A crime persevered in a thousand centuries ceases to be a crime, and becomes a virtue. This is the l...
MARK TWAIN
Man was made at the end of the week's work when God was tired.
MARK TWAIN
We are discreet sheep; we wait to see how the drove is going, and then go with the drove.
MARK TWAIN
...the person that had took a bull by the tail once had learnt sixty or seventy times as much as a p...
MARK TWAIN
Of all God's creatures there is only one that cannot be made the slave of the lash. That one is the ...
MARK TWAIN
There are two times in a man's life when he should not speculate: when he can't afford it, and when ...
MARK TWAIN
When angry, count four; when very angry, swear.
MARK TWAIN
Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the real...
MARK TWAIN
Everybody talks about the weather, but nobody does anything about it.
MARK TWAIN
A man can seldom -- very, very, seldom -- fight a winning fight against his training; the odds are t...
MARK TWAIN
There are lies, damned lies, and statistics.
MARK TWAIN
If to be interesting is to be uncommonplace, it is becoming a question, with me, if there are any co...
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It isn't safe to sit in judgment upon another person's illusion when you are not on the inside. Whil...
MARK TWAIN
Accident is the name of the greatest of all inventors.
MARK TWAIN
I did not attend his funeral; but I wrote a nice letter saying I approved of it. About a politician ...
MARK TWAIN
Evolution is the law of policies: Darwin said it, Socrates endorsed it, Cuvier proved it and establi...
MARK TWAIN
Sacred cows make the best hamburger.
MARK TWAIN
What, then, is the true Gospel of consistency? Change. Who is the really consistent man? The man who...
MARK TWAIN
The radical invents the views. When he has worn them out, the conservative adopts them.
MARK TWAIN
The cross of the Legion of Honor has been conferred on me. However, few escape that distinction.
MARK TWAIN
He liked to like people, therefore people liked him.
MARK TWAIN
True irreverence is disrespect for another man's god.
MARK TWAIN
In his private heart no man much respects himself.
MARK TWAIN
When people do not respect us we are sharply offended; yet deep down in his private heart no man muc...
MARK TWAIN
There are people who can do all fine and heroic things but one: keep from telling their happiness to...
MARK TWAIN
The Pause; that impressive silence, that eloquent silence, that geometrically progressive silence wh...
MARK TWAIN
Don't part with your illusions. When they are gone you may still exist, but you have ceased to live...
MARK TWAIN
If you can't get a compliment any other way, pay yourself one.
MARK TWAIN
Advertisements contain the only truths to be relied on in a newspaper.
MARK TWAIN
There are people who exaggerate so much that they can't tell the truth without lying.
MARK TWAIN
There has been much tragedy in my life; at least half of it actually happend. -Mark Twain.
MARK TWAIN
Hunger is the handmaid of genius
MARK TWAIN
In order to keep a true perspective of one's importance, everyone should have a dog that will worshi...
MARK TWAIN
The offspring of riches: Pride, vanity, ostentation, arrogance, tyranny
MARK TWAIN
And always we had wars, and more wars, and still other wars — all over Europe, all over the world....
MARK TWAIN
In Nevada, for a time, the lawyer, the editor, the banker, the chief desperado, the chief gambler, a...
MARK TWAIN
To be good is noble, but to teach others how to be good is nobler and less trouble.
MARK TWAIN
What would men be without women? Scarce, sir...mighty scarce.
MARK TWAIN
Always do what is right. It will gratify half of mankind and astound the other.
MARK TWAIN
When red-headed people are above a certain social grade their hair is auburn.
MARK TWAIN
The very ink with which all history is written is merely fluid prejudice
MARK TWAIN
Etiquette requires us to admire the human race
MARK TWAIN
Fiction is obliged to stick to possibilities. Truth isn't.
MARK TWAIN
The worst loneliness is to not be comfortable with yourself.
MARK TWAIN
Habit is habit, and not to be flung out the window by man, but coaxed downstairs, a step at a time.
MARK TWAIN
Habit is habit and not to be flung out of the window by any man, but coaxed downstairs a step at a t...
MARK TWAIN
When in doubt, tell the truth.
MARK TWAIN
Man is the Only Animal that Blushes. Or needs to.
MARK TWAIN
Never learn to do anything: if you don't learn, you'll always find someone else to do it for you.
MARK TWAIN
There is something fascinating about science. One gets such wholesale returns of conjecture out of s...
MARK TWAIN
Sane and intelligent human beings are like all other human beings, and carefully and cautiously and ...
MARK TWAIN
Truth is more of a stranger than fiction.
MARK TWAIN
Virtue has never been as respectable as money.
MARK TWAIN
Frankness is a jewel; only the young can afford it
MARK TWAIN
Part of the secret of success in life is to eat what you like and let the food fight it out inside.
MARK TWAIN
Let us be thankful for the fools. But for them the rest of us could not succeed.
MARK TWAIN
It was wonderful to find America, but it would have been more wonderful to miss it.
MARK TWAIN
The man who does not read good books has no advantage over the man who cannot read them.
MARK TWAIN
The difference between the right word and the almost right word is the difference between lightning ...
MARK TWAIN
I was seldom able to see an opportunity until it had ceased to be one
MARK TWAIN
Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the one...
MARK TWAIN
Be good and you will be lonely.
MARK TWAIN
Any so-called material thing that you want is merely a symbol: you want it not for itself, but becau...
MARK TWAIN
I cannot call to mind a single instance where I have ever been irreverent, except toward the things ...
MARK TWAIN
When you cannot get a compliment any other way pay yourself one.
MARK TWAIN
It is more trouble to make a maxim than it is to do right
MARK TWAIN
The very ink in which history is written is merely fluid prejudice.
MARK TWAIN
Prejudice cannot see the things that are because it is always looking for things that aren't
MARK TWAIN
Prophecy: Two bull's eyes out of a possible million
MARK TWAIN
We are always more anxious to be distinguished for a talent which we do not possess, than to be prai...
MARK TWAIN
Biographies are but the clothes and buttons of the man. The biography of the man himself cannot be w...
MARK TWAIN
The reports of my death have been greatly exaggerated.
MARK TWAIN
Necessity is the mother of taking chances.
MARK TWAIN
Get your facts first, then you can distort them as you please.
MARK TWAIN
Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it is time to pause and reflect.
MARK TWAIN
The only way to keep your health is to eat what you don't want, drink what you don't like, a...
MARK TWAIN
Familiarity breeds contempt - and children.
MARK TWAIN
Good friends, good books and a sleepy conscience: this is the ideal life.
MARK TWAIN
It ain't what you don't know that gets you into trouble. It's what you know for sure tha...
MARK TWAIN
Ideally a book would have no order to it, and the reader would have to discover his own.
MARK TWAIN
Nothing so needs reforming as other people's habits.
MARK TWAIN
The trouble ain't that there is too many fools, but that the lightning ain't distributed rig...
MARK TWAIN
But who prays for Satan? Who, in eighteen centuries, has had the common humanity to pray for the one...
MARK TWAIN
It's not the size of the dog in the fight, it's the size of the fight in the dog.
MARK TWAIN
It is by the goodness of God that we have those three unspeakably precious things: freedom of speech...
MARK TWAIN
Suppose you were an idiot and suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself
MARK TWAIN
I've never let my school interfere with my education.
MARK TWAIN
There is nothing training cannot do. Nothing is above its reach. It can turn bad morals to good; it ...
MARK TWAIN
A lie can travel halfway around the world while the truth is still putting on its shoes
MARK TWAIN
He said, 'I've never seen a festival where the whole nation gets behind an event. The Cup astonishes...
MARK TWAIN
When I was a boy on the Mississippi River there was a proposition in a township there to discontinue...
MARK TWAIN
Slang in a woman's mouth is not obscene, it only sounds so
MARK TWAIN
The political and commercial morals of the United States are not merely food for laughter, they are ...
MARK TWAIN
To my mind Judas Iscariot was nothing but a low, mean, premature Congressman
MARK TWAIN
Each man is afraid of his neighbor's disapproval - a thing which, to the general run of the human ra...
MARK TWAIN
I don't like to commit myself about heaven and hell - you see, I have friends in both places
MARK TWAIN
Don't say the old lady screamed. Bring her on and let her scream.
MARK TWAIN
God's great cosmic joke on the human race was requiring that men and women live together in marriage
MARK TWAIN
A crowded police court docket is the surest of all signs that trade is brisk and money plenty
MARK TWAIN
It was a soft, reposeful summer landscape, as lovely as a dream, and as lonesome as Sunday.
MARK TWAIN
There is nothing like instances to grow hair on a bald-headed argument.
MARK TWAIN
Laws are sand, customs are rock. Laws can be evaded and punishment escaped, but an openly transgress...
MARK TWAIN
It's good sportsmanship to not pick up lost golf balls while they are still rolling.
MARK TWAIN
Fortune knocks at every man's door once in a life, but in a good many cases the man is in a neighbor...
MARK TWAIN
One of my theories is that the hearts of men are about alike, no matter what their skin color.
MARK TWAIN
What a wee little part of a person's life are his acts and his words! His real life is led in his he...
MARK TWAIN
When we set about accounting for a Napoleon or a Shakespeare or a Raphael or a Wagner or an Edison o...
MARK TWAIN
Love seems the swiftest, but it is the slowest of all growths. No man or woman really knows what per...
MARK TWAIN
Substitute 'damn' every time you're inclined to write 'very'; your editor will d...
MARK TWAIN
Lord save us all from old age and broken health and a hope tree that has lost the faculty of putting...
MARK TWAIN
Most writers regard truth as their most valuable possession, and therefore are most economical in it...
MARK TWAIN
Fiction is obliged to stick to possibilities. Truth isn't.
MARK TWAIN
Of all the various kinds of sexual intercourse, this has the least to recommend it. As an amusement,...
MARK TWAIN
Man is the only creature who has a nasty mind.
MARK TWAIN
A myriad of men are born; they labor and sweat and struggle; ...they squabble and scold and fight; t...
MARK TWAIN
Life does not consist mainly, or even largely, of facts and happenings. It consists mainly of the st...
MARK TWAIN
Whoever has lived long enough to find out what life is, knows how deep a debt of gratitude we owe to...
MARK TWAIN
As to the adjective, when in doubt strike it out.
MARK TWAIN
When you ascend the hill of prosperity, may you not meet a friend.
MARK TWAIN
Prosperity is the surest breeder of insolence I know.
MARK TWAIN
When the doctrine of allegiance to party can utterly up-end a man's moral constitution and make a te...
MARK TWAIN
Man is a Religious Animal. He is the only Religious Animal. He is the only animal that has the True ...
MARK TWAIN
There was never a century nor a country that was short of experts who knew the Deity's mind and were...
MARK TWAIN
The lack of money is the root of all evils.
MARK TWAIN
People are much more willing to lend you books than bookcases.
MARK TWAIN
My books are water; those of the great geniuses are wine -- everybody drinks water.
MARK TWAIN
Methuselah lived to be 969 years old . You boys and girls will see more in the next fifty years than...
MARK TWAIN
Optimist: Day-dreamer more elegantly spelled
MARK TWAIN
Humor must not professedly teach and it must not professedly preach, but it must do both if it would...
MARK TWAIN
Good friends, good books and a sleepy conscience: this is the ideal life. The conviction of the rich...
MARK TWAIN
Often the surest way to convey misinformation is to tell the strict truth.
MARK TWAIN
I do not like work even when someone else does it.
MARK TWAIN
All schools, all colleges, have two great functions: to confer, and to conceal, valuable knowledge. ...
MARK TWAIN
Soap and education are not as sudden as a massacre, but they are more deadly in the long run. Traini...
MARK TWAIN
It is by the fortune of God that, in this country, we have three benefits: freedom of speech, freedo...
MARK TWAIN
Youth is wonderful. It's a shame to waste it on the young.
MARK TWAIN
There are some books that refuse to be written. They stand their ground year after year and will not...
MARK TWAIN
You are a coward when you even seem to have backed down from a thing you openly set out to do
MARK TWAIN
I asked Tom if countries always apologized when they had done wrong, and he says - "Yes; the little ...
MARK TWAIN
It isn't so astonishing the number of things that I can remember, as the number of things that I can...
MARK TWAIN
Epitaphs are cheap, and they do a poor chap a world of good after he is dead, especially if he had h...
MARK TWAIN
The universal brotherhood of man is our most precious possession, what there is of it
MARK TWAIN
In all my travels the thing that has impressed me the most is the universal brotherhood of man what ...
MARK TWAIN
I am glad the old masters are all dead, and I only wish they had died sooner.
MARK TWAIN
Heaven goes by favor; if it went by merit, you would stay out and your dog would go in
MARK TWAIN
I have traveled more than any one else, and I have noticed that even the angels speak English with a...
MARK TWAIN
Nothing so liberalizes a man and expands the kindly instincts that nature put in him as travel and c...
MARK TWAIN
Familiarity breeds contempt - and children
MARK TWAIN