[┐∵]┘ try 1ClickRepeater.com repeat youtube videos

Death is one of the few things that can be done as easily lying down. The difference between sex and death is that with death you can do it alone and no one is going to make fun of you. •Woody Allen At the end of the game the king and the pawn go back in the same box. •Italian Proverb Life is a great surprise. I don't see why death should not be an even greater one. •Vladimir Nabokov Dear World, I am leaving because I am bored. I feel I have lived long enough. I am leaving you with your worries in this sweet cesspool. Good luck. •George Sanders, his suicide note There is no cure for birth and death save to enjoy the interval. •Santayana Life does not cease to be funny when people die any more than it ceases to be serious when people laugh. •George Bernard Shaw Do not go gentle into that good night. Old age should burn and rave at close of day. Rage, rage against the dying of the light. •Dylan Thomas To live is to dream and to die is to awaken. •Anonymous We sometimes congratulate ourselves at the moment of waking from a troubled dream; it may be so at the moment after death. •Nathaniel Hawthorne All changes, even the most longed for, have their melancholy; for what we leave behind us is a part of ourselves; we must die to one life before we can enter another. •Anatole France We are bound to our bodies like an oyster is to its shell. •Plato Dying is like getting out of a car. You leave a shell behind, but you're the same person as ever. •President Klein The mark of your ignorance is the depth of your belief in injustice and tragedy . What the caterpillar calls the end of the world, the master calls a butterfly. •Richard Bach If there is a sin against life, it consists perhaps not so much in despairing of life as in hoping for another life and in eluding the implacable grandeur of this life. •Albert Camus We do not know what to do with this short life, yet we yearn for another that will be eternal. •Anatole France I'm the one who has to die when it's time for me to die, so let me live my life, the way I want to. •Jimi Hendrix The real malady is fear of life, not of death.


Woody Allen

  Email Quote to Friends   Link to Quote   Create Short URL  Publish Text About This Quote   Share on Facebook, Twitter, and more
  See Recommended Quotes For You

Related

May I never neither turn left nor turn right in my journey of life, but may I go straight to Christ ...
ERNEST AGYEMANG YEBOAH
Empathy is the new measurement of everything. It doesn't matter what religion you have, what God you...
C. JOYBELL C.
Each of us views life through a different lens. What we think is colored by the baggage we carry, an...
LAURIE BUCHANAN, PHD
I like to open for a band as it brings on sort of a challenge and it makes things more interesting. ...
KELLY JONES
Life is not a game. Still, in this life, we choose the games we live to play.
J.R. RIM
We all are wearing many hundred glasses of different colors. Therefore, everyone sees the world in d...
MUDITHA CHAMPIKA
Like all best families, we have our share of eccentricities, of impetuous and wayward youngsters and...
QUEEN ELIZABETH II
My husband has quite simply been my strength and stay all these years, and I owe him a debt greater ...
QUEEN ELIZABETH II
I have been aware all the time that my peoples, spread far and wide throughout every continent and o...
QUEEN ELIZABETH II
The upward course of a nation's history is due in the long run to the soundness of heart of its ...
QUEEN ELIZABETH II
Therefore I am sure that this, my Coronation, is not the symbol of a power and a splendor that are g...
QUEEN ELIZABETH II
The events that I have attended to mark my Diamond Jubilee have been a humbling experience. It has t...
QUEEN ELIZABETH II
I have in sincerity pledged myself to your service, as so many of you are pledged to mine. Throughou...
QUEEN ELIZABETH II
I hope that tomorrow we can all, wherever we are, join in expressing our grief at Diana's loss, ...
QUEEN ELIZABETH II
Like all the best families, we have our share of eccentricities, of impetuous and wayward youngsters...
QUEEN ELIZABETH II
I think that many people will intentionally overlook all of the lifeless facts about their relations...
C. JOYBELL C.
The unfortunate thing is that, sometimes, we slip, but, fortunately, consciously or unconsciously, w...
ERNEST AGYEMANG YEBOAH
Be kind. We never know what people are going through. Give grace and mercy because one day your circ...
GERMANY KENT
From the Kindle Book Reflections in the Mirror of Life:
“In a slum somewhere in India
As...
THE PROPHET OF LIFE
First, I want to pay tribute to Diana myself. She was an exceptional and gifted human being. In good...
QUEEN ELIZABETH II
I cannot lead you into battle. I do not give you laws or administer justice but I can do something e...
QUEEN ELIZABETH II
I declare before you all that my whole life, whether it be long or short, shall be devoted to your s...
QUEEN ELIZABETH II
We lost the American colonies because we lacked the statesmanship to know the right time and the man...
QUEEN ELIZABETH II
These wretched babies don't come until they are ready.
QUEEN ELIZABETH II
I know of no single formula for success. But over the years I have observed that some attributes of ...
QUEEN ELIZABETH II
It is easy enough to define what the Commonwealth is not. Indeed this is quite a popular pastime.
QUEEN ELIZABETH II
I have to be seen to be believed.
QUEEN ELIZABETH II
At Christmas, I am always struck by how the spirit of togetherness lies also at the heart of the Chr...
QUEEN ELIZABETH II
For many, Christmas is also a time for coming together. But for others, service will come first.
QUEEN ELIZABETH II
The lessons from the peace process are clear; whatever life throws at us, our individual responses w...
QUEEN ELIZABETH II
I myself prefer my New Zealand eggs for breakfast.
QUEEN ELIZABETH II
The British constitution has always been puzzling and always will be.
QUEEN ELIZABETH II
Madam President, speaking here in Dublin Castle it is impossible to ignore the weight of history, as...
QUEEN ELIZABETH II
In remembering the appalling suffering of war on both sides, we recognise how precious is the peace ...
QUEEN ELIZABETH II
What were once only hopes for the future have now come to pass; it is almost exactly 13 years since ...
QUEEN ELIZABETH II
To all those who have suffered as a consequence of our troubled past I extend my sincere thoughts an...
QUEEN ELIZABETH II
Grief is the price we pay for love.
QUEEN ELIZABETH II
At its heart, engineering is about using science to find creative, practical solutions. It is a nobl...
QUEEN ELIZABETH II
To what greater inspiration and counsel can we turn than to the imperishable truth to be found in th...
QUEEN ELIZABETH II
It's all to do with the training: you can do a lot if you're properly trained.
QUEEN ELIZABETH II
I have behind me not only the splendid traditions and the annals of more than a thousand years but t...
QUEEN ELIZABETH II
No one who knew Diana will ever forget her. Millions of others who never met her, but felt they knew...
QUEEN ELIZABETH II
I don't know if I have a favorite color.
KATE MIDDLETON
It's very special having a new little girl.
KATE MIDDLETON
If we cannot always be entirely sane in our relationships, the kindest thing we can do for those who...
THE SCHOOL OF LIFE
Clay in the hands of a good potter suffers so many good turns, but in the end, we see its real and t...
ERNEST AGYEMANG YEBOAH
Maya Angelou had the ability to glean inspiration out of pain.
THE PROPHET OF LIFE
Each man lives in his own universe and when he dies the world is over
BANGAMBIKI HABYARIMANA
The fear of God is the only cure for the fear of people.
CRAIG GROESCHEL
Don't you ever get the feeling that all your life is going by and you're not taking advantage of it?...
ERNEST HEMINGWAY
Another year is ending, but something is pending
ERNEST AGYEMANG YEBOAH
You're afraid of getting hurt like I'm afraid to die. It doesn't mean I'm not going to live every da...
VI KEELAND
Kindness is universal. Sometimes being kind allows others to see the goodness in humanity through yo...
GERMANY KENT
Life begins somewhere and ends somewhere with time but to get somewhere with the life you have depen...
ERNEST AGYEMANG YEBOAH
We die a day at a time
BANGAMBIKI HABYARIMANA
How should I know?" said Alice, surprised at her own courage. "It's no business of mine."
The Q...
LEWIS CARROLL
Everything we do really is just a little marker on the long road to death. And sometimes that’s ov...
JOSS WHEDON
The battle is not physical, it is spiritual and your mind is the battleground. Keep your mind pure a...
JEANETTE CORON
Death is one of the few things that can be done as easily lying down. The difference between sex and...
WOODY ALLEN
Wake up to a brand new day and realize why you woke up to meet the day! Live to the end of another d...
ERNEST AGYEMANG YEBOAH
The end of the world is a strange concept. The world is always ending, and the end is always being a...
NEIL GAIMAN
Those who have lived a good life do not fear death, but meet it calmly, and even long for it in the ...
SOURCE UNKNOWN
The best thing you can do for your kids is to show them God working in you on a daily basis.
CRAIG GROESCHEL
Orion is above the horizon now, and near it Jupiter, brighter than it will ever be ... But i expect ...
THOMAS HARRIS
All changes, even the most longed for, have their melancholy; for what we leave behind is a part of ...
GAIL SHEEHY
All changes, even the most longed for, have their melancholy; for what we leave behind us is a part ...
ANATOLE FRANCE
Anything man can make, man can destroy.
JONATHAN ANTHONY BURKETT
Life is short, and that's why, I don't test people; because we all fail tests sometimes, but that is...
C. JOYBELL C.
Since the dawn of existence, you mortals have feared dying, feared the unknown and the pain o...
VERA NAZARIAN
In the journey of life, certain paths may seem to be leading nowhere because of a mountain or hill o...
ERNEST AGYEMANG YEBOAH
To have the cognitive abilities to do research and development is vital to a forever expanding world...
GARY F EVANS...
(All the grief she had suffered over her lifetime had moulded her face into a mask of eternal sadnes...
JEAN SASSON
Smiling at death seems like a pretty bold act. And so I smile like a damned fool.
EMM COLE
Life can only be understood looking backward. It must be lived forward.
ERIC ROTH
The tree of life is made of purity, eternity and has the bark of wisdom and enlightenment.With its b...
GARY F EVANS...
I live my life progressing for nothing else but the best.
JONATHAN ANTHONY BURKETT
Anything that is exclusive will be accused of elitism; living one’s dreams will be called pretenti...
FENNEL HUDSON
You see death is a tool to degrade and destroy people, I see it as a life lesson that I use to empow...
ANGEL RAMON MEDINA
Home is watching the moon rise over the open, sleeping land and having someone you can call to the w...
STEPHEN KING
Road to destination is often very straight with journey smooth, but majority has tendency to meander...
ANUJ SOMANY
Nicolas Cage is the best for taking the role of character Joker. He is pretty damn good at jokes!
DEYTH BANGER
Feast of Commemoration of Helena, Protector of the Faith, 330 The cross is laid on every Christian...
DIETRICH BONHOEFFER
Death is a stripping away of all that is not you. The secret of life is to "die before you die" --- ...
ECKHART TOLLE
For if there is a sin against life, it consists perhaps not so much in despairing of life as in hopi...
ALBERT CAMUS
When I want to move, I remember death, how it is ultimate and inevitable, and pure. Then I am free t...
D.H. LAWRENCE
A new day is here! yesterday is gone! tomorrow is preparing to come! but why is today here?
ERNEST AGYEMANG YEBOAH
i know im not the girl you wanted. not the one you want to hear from. but what you see is what you g...
SIMI GREWAL
I have better understanding how difficult and complex life can be, fortunately I know when not to ta...
SHELLIE PALMER
Remembering that I'll be dead soon is the most important tool I've ever encountered to help me make ...
STEVE JOBS
The love you get, is equal to the love you give.
BEN OAK
If there is a sin against life, it consists perhaps not so much in despairing of life as in hoping f...
ALBERT CAMUS
If there is a sin against life, it consists perhaps not so much in despairing of life as in hoping f...
ALBERT CAMUS
No one wants to die. Even people who want to go to heaven don't want to die to get there. And ye...
STEVE JOBS
You must save what you can of your life; you musn't lose it all simply because you've lost a part.
HENRY JAMES
We are hell different but vanity keeps us stuck.
PARUL WADHWA
Creativity is not just thinking outside the box but living outside it.
VICTOR SHAMAS
There is always a good choice and there is always a better choice. There is always the best choice a...
ERNEST AGYEMANG YEBOAH
Belgium is modernizing itself and it gives me joy.
ALBERT II OF BELGIUM
Role models can inspire. Campaigns can motivate. But if we want all girls everywhere to rise up, the...
QUEEN RANIA OF JORDAN
When you deprive people of their right to live in dignity, to hope for a better future, to have cont...
QUEEN RANIA OF JORDAN

More Woody Allen

I'm not afraid of death; I just don't want to be there when it happens.
WOODY ALLEN
It doesn't make a difference what temperature a room is, it's always room temperature.
WOODY ALLEN
One small decision can change your life! That's why I always let someone else make my decisions, tha...
WOODY ALLEN
Growing up is amazing, until you get old!
WOODY ALLEN
For a while we pondered whether to take a vacation or get a divorce. We decided that a trip to Bermu...
WOODY ALLEN
Today I saw a red and yellow sunset and thought, how insignificant I am! Of course, I thought that y...
WOODY ALLEN
It shows exactly what you can do if you're a total psychotic.
WOODY ALLEN
The lion and the calf will lay down together, but the calf won't get much sleep..
WOODY ALLEN
Man consists of two parts, his mind and his body, only the body has more fun.
WOODY ALLEN
In Beverly Hills... they don't throw their garbage away. They make it into television shows.
WOODY ALLEN
If my films make one more person miserable, I'll feel I have done my job.
WOODY ALLEN
I don't respond well to mellow, you know what I mean, I have a tendency to... if I get too mellow, I...
WOODY ALLEN
I'm not afraid to die, I just don't want to be there when it happens.
WOODY ALLEN
I think being funny is not anyone's first choice.
WOODY ALLEN
More than at any other time in history, mankind faces a crossroads. One path leads to despair and ut...
WOODY ALLEN
A fast word about oral contraception. I asked a girl to go to bed with me, she said 'no'.
WOODY ALLEN
What if nothing exists and we're all in somebody's dream? Or what's worse, what if only that fat guy...
WOODY ALLEN
I was nauseous and tingly all over. I was either in love or I had smallpox.
WOODY ALLEN
I was thrown out of college for cheating on the metaphysics exam; I looked into the soul of the boy ...
WOODY ALLEN
To love is to suffer. To avoid suffering, one must not love. But then, one suffers from not loving. ...
WOODY ALLEN
Life is divided into the horrible and the miserable.
WOODY ALLEN
How to make God laugh: Tell him your future plans.
WOODY ALLEN
Men learn to love the woman they are attracted to. Women learn to become attracted to the man they f...
WOODY ALLEN
I don't want to achieve immortality through my work... I want to achieve it through not dying.
WOODY ALLEN
There are two types of people in this world, good and bad. The good sleep better, but the bad seem t...
WOODY ALLEN
More than any other time in history, mankind faces a crossroads. One path leads to despair and utter...
WOODY ALLEN
Students achieving Oneness will move on to Twoness.
WOODY ALLEN
My education was dismal. I went to a series of schools for mentally disturbed teachers.
WOODY ALLEN
It seemed the world was divided into good and bad people. The good ones slept better while the bad o...
WOODY ALLEN
In Beverly Hills... they don't throw their garbage away. They make it into television shows.
WOODY ALLEN
I'm very proud of my gold pocket watch. My grandfather, on his deathbed, sold me this watch.
WOODY ALLEN
Some guy hit my fender the other day, and I said unto him, 'Be fruitful, and multiply'. But not in t...
WOODY ALLEN
She wore a short skirt and a tight sweater and her figure described a set of parabolas that could ca...
WOODY ALLEN
I'd never join a club that would allow a person like me to become a member.
WOODY ALLEN
The last time I was inside a woman was when I was inside the Statue of Liberty.
WOODY ALLEN
I don't think my parents liked me. They put a live teddy bear in my crib.
WOODY ALLEN
The higher the school rating the better off we are in having perspective projects look at our area,
WOODY ALLEN
A ''Bay Area Bisexual'' told me I didn't quite coincide with either of her desires.
WOODY ALLEN
I like the rain. It washes memories off the sidewalk of life.
WOODY ALLEN
The heart wants what it wants.
WOODY ALLEN
Chapter 1.
He adored New York City. He idolized it all out of proportion...no, make t...
WOODY ALLEN
Those who can't do, teach. And those who can't teach, teach gym.
WOODY ALLEN
You rely too much on brain. The brain is the most overrated organ.
WOODY ALLEN
Early in life, I was visited by the bluebird of anxiety
WOODY ALLEN
If you're not failing every now and again, it's a sign you're not doing anything very innovative.
WOODY ALLEN
That [sex] was the most fun I ever had without laughing.
WOODY ALLEN
I am very attached to this watch. My grandfather sold it to me when he was dying.
WOODY ALLEN
Love is the answer, but while you're waiting for the answer, sex raises some pretty good questions.
WOODY ALLEN
Sex between a man and a woman can be absolutely wonderful - provided you get between the right man a...
WOODY ALLEN
believe it when I see it.
WOODY ALLEN
All men fear death. It’s a natural fear that consumes us all. We fear death because we feel that w...
WOODY ALLEN
There are worse things in life than death. Have you ever spent an evening with an insurance salesman...
WOODY ALLEN
I do not believe in an afterlife, although I am bringing a change of underwear.
WOODY ALLEN
I was thrown out of college for cheating on the metaphysics exam; I looked into the soul of the boy ...
WOODY ALLEN
And my parents finally realize that I'm kidnapped and they snap into action immediately: They rent o...
WOODY ALLEN
I don't have to 'freedom-kiss' my wife when what I really want to do is French-kiss her.
WOODY ALLEN
I didn't know he was dead; I thought he was British
WOODY ALLEN
The artist's job is not to succumb to despair but to find an antidote for the emptiness of existence...
WOODY ALLEN
All the crap that they tell you about ... getting joy, and having a kind of wisdom in your golden ye...
WOODY ALLEN
Now we're in the final stages. There's a lot of (due diligence) work to be done in the next 120 days...
WOODY ALLEN
There's an old joke - um... two elderly women are at a Catskill mountain resort, and one of 'em says...
WOODY ALLEN
In California, they don't throw their garbage away - they make it into TV shows.
WOODY ALLEN
When we played softball, I'd steal second base, feel guilty and go back.
WOODY ALLEN
Love is too weak a word for what I feel - I luuurve you, you know, I loave you, I luff you, two F's,...
WOODY ALLEN
Това описание е било изтълкувано от средновековното д...
WOODY ALLEN
In my next life I want to live my life backwards. You start out dead and get that out of the way. Th...
WOODY ALLEN
Is sex dirty? Only when it's being done right.
WOODY ALLEN
In perpetrating a revolution, there are two requirements: someone or something to revolt against and...
WOODY ALLEN
I was thrown out of N.Y.U. my freshman year for cheating on my metaphysics final. You know, I looked...
WOODY ALLEN
I am at two with nature.
WOODY ALLEN
Money is better than poverty, if only for financial reasons.
WOODY ALLEN
Marriage is the death of hope.
WOODY ALLEN
If only God would give me some clear sign! Like making a large deposit in my name at a Swiss bank.
WOODY ALLEN
It is no secret that organized crime in America takes in over forty billion dollars a year. This is ...
WOODY ALLEN
Of all the wonders of nature, a tree in summer is perhaps the most remarkable; with the possible exc...
WOODY ALLEN
A relationship, I think, is like a shark, you know? It has to constantly move forward or it dies. An...
WOODY ALLEN
Remember, if you smoke after sex you're doing it too fast.
WOODY ALLEN
Organized crime in America takes in over forty billion dollars a year and spends very little on offi...
WOODY ALLEN
To you I'm an atheist; to God, I'm the Loyal Opposition.
WOODY ALLEN
I can't listen to that much Wagner. I start getting the urge to conquer Poland.
WOODY ALLEN
How is it possible to find meaning in a finite world, given my waist and shirt size?
WOODY ALLEN
His lack of education is more than compensated for by his keenly developed moral bankruptcy.
WOODY ALLEN
My one regret in life is that I am not someone else.
WOODY ALLEN
When I was kidnapped, my parents snapped into action. They rented out my room.
WOODY ALLEN
The government is unresponsive to the needs of the little man. Under 5'7", it is impossible to get y...
WOODY ALLEN
Most of the time I don't have much fun. The rest of the time I don't have any fun at all.
WOODY ALLEN
Life is full of misery, loneliness, and suffering - and it's all over much too soon.
WOODY ALLEN
I was thrown out of college for cheating on the metaphysics exam; I looked into the soul of the bo...
WOODY ALLEN
It's not that I'm afraid to die. I just don't want to be there when it happens.
WOODY ALLEN
Whosoever shall not fall by the sword or by famine, shall fall by pestilence, so why bother shaving?
WOODY ALLEN
Whosover loveth wisdom is righteous, but he that keepeth company with fowl is weird.
WOODY ALLEN
Bisexuality immediately doubles your chances for a date on Saturday night.
WOODY ALLEN
Life doesn't imitate art, it imitates bad television.
WOODY ALLEN
If you want to make God laugh, tell him about your plans.
WOODY ALLEN
What if everything is an illusion and nothing exists? In that case, I definitely overpaid for my car...
WOODY ALLEN
The talent for being happy is appreciating and liking what you have, instead of what you don't h...
WOODY ALLEN
I'd call him a sadistic, hippophilic necrophile, but that would be beating a dead horse.
WOODY ALLEN
I don't want to achieve immortality through my work. I want to achieve it through not dying.
WOODY ALLEN
Sex is like air; it's not important unless you aren't getting any
WOODY ALLEN
sex is simple, love stings afterwards.
WOODY ALLEN
Psychoanalyses is like music lessons, for 5 years you do not notice any progress and suddenly you ca...
WOODY ALLEN
Basically my wife was immature. I'd be at home in the bath and she would come in and sink my boats.
WOODY ALLEN
I don't want to achieve immortality through my work. I want to achieve it through not dying.
WOODY ALLEN
Love is the answer, but while you're waiting for the answer, sex raises some pretty interesting qu...
WOODY ALLEN
Some guy hit my fender, and I told him, 'Be fruitful and multiply,' but not in those words.
WOODY ALLEN
I'm a timid person-I was beaten up by Quakers
WOODY ALLEN
What if nothing exists and we're all in somebody's dream?
WOODY ALLEN
Life is hard for insects. And don't think mice are having any fun either.
WOODY ALLEN
I don't know the question, but sex is definitely the answer
WOODY ALLEN
Believing would be easier if God would show himself by depositing a million dollars in a Swiss bank ...
WOODY ALLEN
It is a known secret that organized crime in America takes in over 40 billion dollars a year. This i...
WOODY ALLEN
Death is one of the few things that can be done as easily lying down. The difference between sex and...
WOODY ALLEN
I want to tell you a terrific story about oral contraception. I asked this girl to sleep with me and...
WOODY ALLEN
The prison psychiatrist asked me if I thought sex was dirty. I told him only when it's done right.
WOODY ALLEN
The baby is fine, the only problem is that he looks like Edward G. Robinson.
WOODY ALLEN
In my house I'm the boss, my wife is just the decision maker.
WOODY ALLEN
Sex between 2 people is a beautiful thing; between 5 it's fantastic.
WOODY ALLEN
My films are therapy for my debilitating depression. In institutions people weave baskets. I make fi...
WOODY ALLEN
If Jesus came back and saw what was being done in his name, he'd never stop throwing up.
WOODY ALLEN
My brain? That's my second favorite organ.
WOODY ALLEN
As the poet said, "Only God can make a tree" - probably because it's so hard to figure out how to ge...
WOODY ALLEN
Some guy hit my fender, and I told him, 'Be fruitful and multiply,' but not in those words.
WOODY ALLEN
The lion and the calf shall lie down together but the calf won’t get much sleep.
WOODY ALLEN
In my next life I want to live backwards. Start out dead and finish off as an orgasm.
WOODY ALLEN
I believe people ought to mate for life...like pigeons or Catholics.
WOODY ALLEN
Eighty percent of success is just showing up
WOODY ALLEN
Everytime I hear Wagner I feel like invading Poland.
WOODY ALLEN
Basically my wife was immature. I'd be at home in the bath and she'd come in and sink my boats.
WOODY ALLEN
Recently there has been a lot of controversy between the countries, and I would hope that now the tw...
WOODY ALLEN
I'd never join a club that would allow a person like me to become a member.
WOODY ALLEN
Another good thing about being poor is that when you are seventy your children will not have declare...
WOODY ALLEN
If there is reincarnation, I'dd like to come back as Pamela Andersons fingertips.
WOODY ALLEN
The higher the school rating the better off we are in having perspective projects look at our area,
WOODY ALLEN
I think any boycott is wrong, ... Boycotts were exactly what the Germans were doing against the Jews...
WOODY ALLEN
The whole country was tied together by radio. We all experienced the same heroes and comedians and s...
WOODY ALLEN
Cloquet hated reality but realized it was still the only place to get a good steak.
WOODY ALLEN
I was raised in the Jewish tradition, taught never to marry a Gentile woman, shave on a Saturday nig...
WOODY ALLEN
I'm not afraid to die, I just don't want to be there when it happens.
WOODY ALLEN
One day about a month ago, I really hit bottom. You know, I just felt that in a Godless universe, I ...
WOODY ALLEN
There is no question that there is an unseen world. The problem is, how far is it from midtown and h...
WOODY ALLEN
To love is to suffer. To avoid suffering one must not love. But then one suffers from not loving. Th...
WOODY ALLEN
As the poet said, 'Only God can make a tree,' probably because it's so hard to figure ou...
WOODY ALLEN
To you I'm an atheist; to God, I'm the Loyal Opposition.
WOODY ALLEN
I am thankful for laughter, except when milk comes out of my nose.
WOODY ALLEN
What if nothing exists and we're all in somebody's dream?
WOODY ALLEN
Love is the answer, but while you are waiting for the answer, sex raises some pretty good questions.
WOODY ALLEN
I don't know the question, but sex is definitely the answer.
WOODY ALLEN
You know the speed of light; so what is the speed of dark?
WOODY ALLEN
What animal can jump higher than a house? Any animal that can jump at all, because houses can't jum...
WOODY ALLEN
Why does man kill? He kills for food. And not only food: frequently there must be a beverage.
WOODY ALLEN
Capital punishment would be more effective as a preventive measure if it were administered prior to ...
WOODY ALLEN
I've never been an intellectual but I have this look.
WOODY ALLEN
I will not eat oysters. I want my food dead -- not sick, not wounded -- dead.
WOODY ALLEN
I've often said, the only thing standing between me and greatness is me
WOODY ALLEN
What do I dislike about death? Must be the hours.
WOODY ALLEN
The best way to find your perfect match is to meet love halfway.
WOODY ALLEN
The study of economy usually shows us that the best time for purchase was last year.
WOODY ALLEN
It is impossible to experience one's death objectively and still carry a tune.
WOODY ALLEN
I'm astounded by people who want to 'know' the universe when it's hard enough to find your way aroun...
WOODY ALLEN
Eternal nothingness is fine if you happen to be dressed for it.
WOODY ALLEN
Why are our days numbered and not, say, lettered?
WOODY ALLEN
Not only is there no God, but try getting a plumber on weekends.
WOODY ALLEN
If my film makes one more person miserable, I've done my job
WOODY ALLEN
I was thrown out of college for cheating on the metaphysics exam; I looked into the soul of the boy ...
WOODY ALLEN
I will not eat oysters. I want my food dead- not sick, not wounded - dead.
WOODY ALLEN
For the first year of marriage I had basically a bad attitude. I tended to place my wife underneath ...
WOODY ALLEN
I took a test in Existentialism. I left all the answers blank and got 100.
WOODY ALLEN
If it wasn't for dogs, some people would never go for a walk.
WOODY ALLEN
Sex is nature's way of saying 'Hi!'
WOODY ALLEN
The difference between sex and death is that with death you can do it alone and no one is going to m...
WOODY ALLEN
There is a theory which states that if ever anybody discovers exactly what the Universe is for and w...
WOODY ALLEN
I am not afraid of death, I just don't want to be there when it happens.
WOODY ALLEN
The chief problem about death, incidentally, is the fear that there may be no afterlife -- a depress...
WOODY ALLEN
Nietzsche says that we will live the same life, over and over again. God - I'll have to sit through ...
WOODY ALLEN
If there is reincarnation, I'dd like to come back as Pamela Andersons fingertips.
WOODY ALLEN
That [sex] was the most fun I ever had without laughing.
WOODY ALLEN
The curtain rises on a vast primitive wasteland, not unlike certain parts of New jersey.
WOODY ALLEN
Some guy hit my fender and I said "be fruitful and multiply" but not in those words
WOODY ALLEN
I failed to make the chess team because of my height.
WOODY ALLEN
I'm such a good lover because I practice a lot on my own.
WOODY ALLEN
I sold the memoirs of my sex life to a publisher - they are going to make a board game out of it
WOODY ALLEN
The good people sleep much better at night than the bad people. Of course, the bad people enjoy the ...
WOODY ALLEN
You mellow too much you ripen and rot
WOODY ALLEN
Nietzsche says that we will live the same life, over and over again. God - I'll have to sit through ...
WOODY ALLEN
I am at two with nature
WOODY ALLEN
I'm very proud of my gold pocket watch. My grandfather, on his deathbed, sold me this watch.
WOODY ALLEN
Interestingly, according to modern astronomers, space is finite. This is a very comforting thought -...
WOODY ALLEN
Where am I, anyhow? I mean, what happened to everybody?
WOODY ALLEN
My family members are here with me because they're afraid to stay at home. There is no excuse for it...
WOODY ALLEN
I think you should defend to the death their right to march, and then go down and meet them with bas...
WOODY ALLEN
The universe is merely a fleeting idea in God's mind -- a pretty uncomfortable thought, particularly...
WOODY ALLEN
We would often be sorry if our wishes were gratified.
WOODY ALLEN
I don't want to achieve immortality through my work... I want to achieve it by not dying!
WOODY ALLEN
What if everything is an illusion and nothing exists? In that case, I definitely overpaid for my car...
WOODY ALLEN
More than any other time in history, mankind faces a cross-roads. One path leads to despair and utte...
WOODY ALLEN
I work for a company that makes deceptively shallow serving dishes for Chinese restaurants
WOODY ALLEN
These modern analysts! They charge so much. In my day, for five marks Freud himself would treat you....
WOODY ALLEN
We're all faced throughout our lives with agonizing decisions, moral choices. Some are on a grand sc...
WOODY ALLEN
Having sex is like bridge. If you don't have a good partner, you'd better have a good hand.
WOODY ALLEN
I just can't listen to any more Wagner, you know...I'm starting to get the urge to conquer Poland.
WOODY ALLEN